Manchester united team
Edwin Van Duh Bar
Dutch Goalkeeper, watched the spooned shot of John Terry in the champions league final, kept united as the shittest team in history
Gary Neville
Mankind is at a loss to many questions in life
1) Why is the something instead of nothing? 2) Is there a God? 3) Are we alone in the glaxy? 4) How did life first arise? 5) How does Gary Neville get in a side which competes for the title?
His grandparents are either (i) Cruel (ii) retarded (iii) no imagination, all down to the fact the game Gary's dad the same name as his surname to be called "Neville Neville". It is believed it is the 2nd option
Rio de je Ferdihand
He may be one of the best defenders in the league, but in his spare time, he is a drug dealer and has to have advance warning of drugs tests so he can "forget" to go.
Zoran Tosic
former FK Partizan player, no United fans had ever heard of him before. But because he singed for United, he is, by default, amazing and the next big thing
Adem "Little Kaka" Ljajick
When he is called "little Kaka" it is meant, he is like Kaka in everyway except Kaka is good and "Little Kaka" isn't
Patrice du Evra
better than carragher
Wes Orange
The lad loves the Manure fans, he loves the tight Asian pussy due to the fact none of the clubs fans come from Manchester, they come from countries such as China, America and Japan.
Micheal Hardgrave
Mongrel . If he had have been a dog he would have been dumped in a bag and sunk in a river as a puppy. Also doesn't drink milk, which effects his many injuries with weak bones.
Christiano Ronaldo
42 goals in the 07/08 season, says he is happy playing for United, until the Summer transfer window when he will be off to Madrid and Untied will be screwed next season then. Ronaldo has stated that he will miss the Mancunian women when he moves to Spain in the summer, I don't believe Ronaldo heard the womens cries of "Get off me you greasy cunt, I do not want to shag you" and got done for rape. Greasy prick.
Wayne Rooney
Likes Harry Potter, but since he's an idiot, he must be talking about the movies and not the books since he can't read. He doesn't even know which number is which, so when he gets subbed, a large bird call is put out over the speakers for him to leave.
He likes hookers, but ones near death. Yes, a granny lover.
Ryan Giggs
A shaved Wookie (in part), was a reject at Man City. Loves Wales so much he played for England schoolboys.
Dimitar Barby(off)
If you have any information on where he is, please inform the police, he was last seen at Manchester airport where he was put into a car by, as a witness says, a old angry drunk Scot, after he was sent to Man City by Spurs, but never arrived.
Scores most goals from an offside position or by just not moving outside the six yard box, or moving at all.
Ben Tennants
an rising star that nobody has seen play ever! But since United hasn't really done anything with their youth recently, he'll either do nothing for 1st team or get sold to League One
Micheal Carrick
Micheal Carrick left London because he had a rough night in bed with Ashley Cole. Carrick felt that if he wanted to run again and continue his footballing lifestyle it was in his best interests to leave London. Carrick opted for the soft anal fuck of John O'Shea and Wes Brown instead of the rampant Ashley Cole.
Luis Nani
better than that unknown bloke liverpool have on the left wing...no one knows who any of their players are, probably stolen off the black market
Paul Scholes
More famous for his small chalk white penis and fire pubes than his football. Got bullied in school for being ginger. Didn't have sex until Man U paid him enough to get a hooker (a teenage one, unlike the ones Rooney likes)
John O'Shea
John O'Shea takes it up the duffer! Oh Johny he takes it up the arse! John O'shea takes it up the duffer! With the queer lad Wes Brownnnnnn!
Dum-run Fletcher
Makes the Scotland team look better
Carlos Tevez
He won the "Ugliest Man of The Year Award" 2004-2008 (current holder). Said he wants to stay in Manchester (strange since Untied isn't in Manchester) so will be lucky for him when Man City buy him at the end of the season since United can't afford him. Debt is a very bad thing, never mind £800m+ of debt.
Rafeal Da Silva
According to United fans, he is the second coming of Christ (strange, as I don't think Jesus would want to play for the "Red DEVILS"). He seems to have come through the Man Utd youth system, despite being from Brazil, nice to see them using great UK youth talent, then again, who have they produced since the Beckham generation?
Park Ji Sung
Is really just the guy Rooney gets his takeaway from, Ferguson just plays him so Rooney can keep up to date on the menu.
He plays in the #13. Which is to remind Rooney of what his order is, "Everything on the menu excpet salad"
