Beyond Football - Freestyle Football Forum
General Category => General Chat => Topic started by: Chunkchenko on Feb 22, 2008, 12:45: AM
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who can do such a thing to Chuck Norris?
http://news.uk.msn.com/Article.aspx?cp-documentid=7360776
Former CEO pleads guilty to stealing from Chuck Norris' charity
The former chief executive officer of actor Chuck Norris' martial arts program for inner-city children has pleaded guilty to stealing from the charity,
the U.S. Attorney's office said. James D. Brasher, 47, pleaded guilty on Thursday to defrauding the charity, the office said in a statement.
Brasher confessed to opening bank accounts in names similar to that of Norris' Kick Drugs Out of America Foundation. He then fraudulently endorsed
checks sent to the foundation and deposited them into his own accounts, using the money to pay his debts and living expenses. He admitted taking
at least $130,000 (euro88,400), DeGabrielle said. Brasher is set to be sentenced in April. He faces up to 10 years in prison, a fine of $250,000
(euro170,000) and a three-year-term of supervised release.
i think he should get the death penalty for such a crime against a person like Norris.
(http://digilander.libero.it/macs_73/Chuck.jpg)
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filthy just filthy :cursing:
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Chunk norris should roundhouse kick him straigh in the face
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stealing from a charity is what i would expect from people like borg, chunck and melbourne
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stealing from a charity is what i would expect from people like borg, chunck and melbourne
And moby to feed his, out of control food obsession. Which can be seen in the picture of himself under his name.
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i think the punishment should be 3 minutes in a cage with chuck norris :banana:
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a blink of an eye is all Chuck need
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Contrary to popular belief, Chuck Norris, not the box jellyfish of northern Australia, is the most venomous creature on earth. Within 3 minutes of being bitten, a human being experiences the following symptoms: fever, blurred vision, beard rash, tightness of the jeans, and the feeling of being repeatedly kicked through a car windshield.
Chuck Norris is the only man to ever defeat a brick wall in a game of tennis.
Chuck Norris once bet NASA he could survive re-entry without a spacesuit. On July 19th, 1999, a naked Chuck Norris re-entered the earth's atmosphere, streaking over 14 states and reaching a temperature of 3000 degrees. An embarrassed NASA publically claimed it was a meteor, and still owes him a beer.
In an average living room there are 1,242 objects Chuck Norris could use to kill you, including the room itself.
If you have five dollars and Chuck Norris has five dollars, Chuck Norris has more money than you.
There is no 'ctrl' button on Chuck Norris's computer. Chuck Norris is always in control.
Apple pays Chuck Norris 99 cents every time he listens to a song.
Chuck Norris can sneeze with his eyes open.
Chuck Norris can eat just one Lay's potato chip.
Chuck Norris is suing Myspace for taking the name of what he calls everything around you.
Chuck Norris destroyed the periodic table, because he only recognizes the element of surprise.
Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird.
When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.
There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of creatures Chuck Norris has allowed to live.
Outer space exists because it's afraid to be on the same planet with Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.
Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs.
Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding.
Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice.
There is no chin behind Chuck Norris’ beard. There is only another fist.
When Chuck Norris does a pushup, he isn’t lifting himself up, he’s pushing the Earth down.
Chuck Norris is so fast, he can run around the world and punch himself in the back of the head.
Chuck Norris’ hand is the only hand that can beat a Royal Flush.
Chuck Norris can lead a horse to water AND make it drink.
Chuck Norris doesn’t wear a watch, HE decides what time it is.
Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door.
Chuck Norris does not get frostbite. Chuck Norris bites frost
Remember the Soviet Union? They decided to quit after watching a DeltaForce marathon on Satellite TV.
:-[ :-[ :-[
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They once made a Chuck Norris toilet paper, but it wouldn't take shit from anybody
Chuck Norris frequently donates blood to the Red Cross. Just never his own.
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haha i love chuck norris jokes. i think the bible should be replaced with script of Braddock 3. :bowdown:
Chuck Norris uses ribbed condoms inside out, so he gets the pleasure.
Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried.
When Chuck Norris has sex with a man, it is not because he is gay, but because he has run out of women.
Macgyver can build an airplane out of gum and paper clips, but Chuck Norris can kill him and take it.
Chuck Norris once roundhouse kicked someone so hard that his foot broke the speed of light, went back in time, and killed Amelia Earhart while she was flying over the Pacific Ocean.
If you ask Chuck Norris what time it is, he always says, "Two seconds till." After you ask, "Two seconds to what?" he roundhouse kicks you in the face.
Chuck Norris only masturbates to pictures of Chuck Norris.
Rather than being birthed like a normal child, Chuck Norris instead decided to punch his way out of his mother's womb. Shortly thereafter he grew a beard.
Chuck Norris appeared in the "Street Fighter II" video game, but was removed by Beta Testers because every button caused him to do a roundhouse kick. When asked bout this "glitch," Norris replied, "That's no glitch."
Chuck Norris lost his virginity before his dad did.
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i dont understand chuck norris jokes.
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anything you paste in mass just ruins stuff. shouldve posted one at a time. seems more personal.
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i dont understand chuck norris jokes.
most probably because you prefer Macgyver.
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oh, and sorry to double post but im innocently post count boosting, obviously
my favourite was "When Chuck Norris jumps out of a boat, Chuck Norris doesnt get wet, water gets Chuck Norrised".
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Sorry to dig this up but its another sad moment for me.
feature=user
also a few more Chuck Norris facts.
Chuck Norris owns the greatest poker face of all-time. It helped him win the 1983 world series of poker despite him holding? just a joker, a 2 of clubs, a 7 of spades, and a green number 4 from Uno and a monopoly 'get out of jail free' card.
Chuck Norris invented the hamburger by throwing a cow at a chain fence.
Chuck Norris ordered a big mac at burger king and got one.
Giraffes were created when Chuck Norris uppercutted a horse
When Chuck Norris went to the Virgin? Islands and came back, it was just called the Islands.
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Lmao.
Chuck Norris can lick both his elbows at the same time.
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My 2 favorites:
-Why hasn't Chuck Norris got hair on his legs? Because hair doesn't grow on steel.
-Chuck Norris once got in a knife fight. - The knife lost.
-Chuck Norris' hand is the only hand that can beat a Royal Flush.
-Chuck Norris cuts a knife with bread.
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where do you get these things,
pretty funny
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My 2 favorites:
-Why hasn't Chuck Norris got hair on his legs? Because hair doesn't grow on steel.
-Chuck Norris once got in a knife fight. - The knife lost.
-Chuck Norris' hand is the only hand that can beat a Royal Flush.
-Chuck Norris cuts a knife with bread.
Finally a couple I havn't heard :cheers:
Really clever ones aswell
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That guy is amazing !
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Chuck Norris can kick start a car
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Chuck Norris can kick start a car
wow that was very bad
i think my best friend moby would agree on this
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lol when bruce banner gets mad, he turns into the hulk. when hulks gets mad, he turns into chuck norris.
btw macgyver is gay
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Chuck Norris can kick start a car
wow that was very bad
i think my best friend moby would agree on this
what ever man
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A Polish took a trip to Warsaw. While in a bar, an Indian on the next stool spoke to the Norwegian in a friendly manner.
"Look," he said, "let's have a little game. I'll ask you a riddle. If you can answer it, I'll buy you a drink. If you can't then you buy me one. OK?"
"Ja, dat sounds purty good," said the Polish.
The Indian said, "My father and mother had one child. It wasn't my brother. It wasn't my sister. Who was it?"
The Polish scratched his head and finally said, "I give up. Who vas it?"
"It was ME," chortled the Indian.
So the Polish paid for the drinks.
Back in Poznan the Polish went into the bar and spotted one of his cronies.
"Sven," he said, "I got a game. If you can answer a question, I'll buy you a drink. If you can't, you have to buy me vun. Fair enough?"
"Fair enough," said Sven.
"Ok," the Polish said, "my father and mudder had vun child. It vasn't my brudder. It vasn't my sister. Who vas it?"
"Search me," said Sven. "I give up, who vas it?"
The Polish burst out, "It vas some Indian up in Warsaw!"
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haha lovely
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the polish guy was Oli
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the polish guy was Oli
haha,i love that one,made me laugh
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I have a funny one here.
An Australian took a trip to Sydney. While in a bar, an Indian on the next stool spoke to the Norwegian in a friendly manner.
"Look," he said, "let's have a little game. I'll ask you a riddle. If you can answer it, I'll buy you a drink. If you can't then you buy me one. OK?"
"Ja, dat sounds purty good," said the Australian.
The Indian said, "My father and mother had one child. It wasn't my brother. It wasn't my sister. Who was it?"
The Australian scratched his head and finally said, "I give up. Who vas it?"
"It was ME," chortled the Indian.
So the Australian paid for the drinks.
Back in Melbourne the Australian went into the bar and spotted one of his cronies.
"Sven," he said, "I got a game. If you can answer a question, I'll buy you a drink. If you can't, you have to buy me vun. Fair enough?"
"Fair enough," said Sven.
"Ok," the Australian said, "my father and mudder had vun child. It vasn't my brudder. It vasn't my sister. Who vas it?"
"Search me," said Sven. "I give up, who vas it?"
The Australianburst out, "It vas some Indian up in Sydney"
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I have a funny one here.
An Australian took a trip to Sydney. While in a bar, an Indian on the next stool spoke to the Norwegian in a friendly manner.
"Look," he said, "let's have a little game. I'll ask you a riddle. If you can answer it, I'll buy you a drink. If you can't then you buy me one. OK?"
"Ja, dat sounds purty good," said the Australian.
The Indian said, "My father and mother had one child. It wasn't my brother. It wasn't my sister. Who was it?"
The Australian scratched his head and finally said, "I give up. Who vas it?"
"It was ME," chortled the Indian.
So the Australian paid for the drinks.
Back in Melbourne the Australian went into the bar and spotted one of his cronies.
"Sven," he said, "I got a game. If you can answer a question, I'll buy you a drink. If you can't, you have to buy me vun. Fair enough?"
"Fair enough," said Sven.
"Ok," the Australian said, "my father and mudder had vun child. It vasn't my brudder. It vasn't my sister. Who vas it?"
"Search me," said Sven. "I give up, who vas it?"
The Australianburst out, "It vas some Indian up in Sydney"
:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:
post of the month no doubt
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I have a funny one here.
An Australian took a trip to Sydney. While in a bar, an Indian on the next stool spoke to the Norwegian in a friendly manner.
"Look," he said, "let's have a little game. I'll ask you a riddle. If you can answer it, I'll buy you a drink. If you can't then you buy me one. OK?"
"Ja, dat sounds purty good," said the Australian.
The Indian said, "My father and mother had one child. It wasn't my brother. It wasn't my sister. Who was it?"
The Australian scratched his head and finally said, "I give up. Who vas it?"
"It was ME," chortled the Indian.
So the Australian paid for the drinks.
Back in Melbourne the Australian went into the bar and spotted one of his cronies.
"Sven," he said, "I got a game. If you can answer a question, I'll buy you a drink. If you can't, you have to buy me vun. Fair enough?"
"Fair enough," said Sven.
"Ok," the Australian said, "my father and mudder had vun child. It vasn't my brudder. It vasn't my sister. Who vas it?"
"Search me," said Sven. "I give up, who vas it?"
The Australianburst out, "It vas some Indian up in Sydney"
I didnt see Chuck Norris mentioned at all in that joke/fact nor in Titos. :angry:
Theres a joke thread so dont insult a figure such as Chuck Norris the great with non Chuck facts.
Heres some wanking material for all you Chuckamaniacs out there.
Original VHS "Braddock Missing in action 3" I got this about 9 years ago.
(http://i281.photobucket.com/albums/kk218/Chunkchenko/Other%20Items/Chucknorris.jpg)
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I have a funny one here.
An Australian took a trip to Sydney. While in a bar, an Indian on the next stool spoke to the Norwegian in a friendly manner.
"Look," he said, "let's have a little game. I'll ask you a riddle. If you can answer it, I'll buy you a drink. If you can't then you buy me one. OK?"
"Ja, dat sounds purty good," said the Australian.
The Indian said, "My father and mother had one child. It wasn't my brother. It wasn't my sister. Who was it?"
The Australian scratched his head and finally said, "I give up. Who vas it?"
"It was ME," chortled the Indian.
So the Australian paid for the drinks.
Back in Melbourne the Australian went into the bar and spotted one of his cronies.
"Sven," he said, "I got a game. If you can answer a question, I'll buy you a drink. If you can't, you have to buy me vun. Fair enough?"
"Fair enough," said Sven.
"Ok," the Australian said, "my father and mudder had vun child. It vasn't my brudder. It vasn't my sister. Who vas it?"
"Search me," said Sven. "I give up, who vas it?"
The Australianburst out, "It vas some Indian up in Sydney"
(http://www.smh.com.au/ffximage/2008/03/06/holden_narrowweb__300x420,0.jpg)
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Why is there my name in the joke? :cheers: